Bowser's Painful Folly
by golfer
Summary: Another failed attempt by Bowser at trying to capture Princess Peach goes unusually worse for him...and even better for Peach and Mario! Read and Review Please! Just one of many in the series of Mario oneshots.


Okay, My first time writing something besides Smash Bros. I hope I did well. I just have to put my knowledge of everything Mario into it!

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Mario and Luigi were at the target range. They needed to brush up on their fireball throwing, since the last time they fought Bowser, being a few weeks ago, Luigi burned himself because he didn't fire the fireball properly. Bowser was still trying to get himself out of the lava, as far as the plumbers knew. But there they were, training.

"Come on bro" Mario coaxed. "Just focus, and release! Do it like you're throwing a dart!" Mario made the hand motion one would make throwing a dart. Luigi tried it, but the fireball landed in the non-flammable grass. Luigi felt like crying. His brother was always better at him. Racing, shooting, fighting. He was smarter, faster. Luigi only had better jumping, but that didn't help much. Mario was stronger. And now, Luigi still had some trouble with fireball shooting. At this time, Peach came down, escorted by a toad guard. The toad guard, upon seeing Mario, ran towards him and jumped with joy.

"Hi Mr. Mario! What are you and greenie doing today?" The toad asked innocently. Luigi blushed. Nobody ever remembered him. Not even a toad. Mario took his hat off when the princess came up, and Peach kissed Mario on the cheek.

"What are you doing Mario?" Peach asked. Mario just smiled.

"I'm helping Luigi launch fireballs. But he can't. He never did know how. It's my duty, as the big bro, to teach him." Mario said. Peach giggled.

"Oh how noble of you!" Peach said. "Well, I need to go! If I'm away too long, you know how toads get crazy! Tee hee!" Mario waved a white glove at Peach. Luigi couldn't look her in the eye; he felt so ashamed. However, suddenly, Peach stopped in her tracks, and was suddenly pulled into the ground. Mario ran up to the hole, while the toad ran away because he was so frightened. He did scream, and kept screaming. Luigi and Mario were awe struck at how such a little thing with such small legs could go so fast! Luigi forgot his self pity and took a spot by his big brother. Mario always seemed so serious, Luigi thought. Luigi envied his big brother. Mario was so much braver. Luigi always said that if he needed rescuing, Mario would solve it no problem.

Suddenly, the hole opened, and a giant robot came up. It shot dirt and mud and other things by coming up. It was twice Bowser's size. It did, however, look like him. It had the same looking spikes, the same face, the same body colors, and even the hair! It had the same glaring red eyes, and these ones stared at the plumbers. It had a glass head, and through it, the plumbers could see Bowser, covered in bandages, was controlling it.

"Hey, dumber plumbers!" Bowser yelled. "I got Peach. Now I'm unstoppable. I'm immune to fire, water, magic, and I am indestructible! FEAR ME!" Then, Bowser grabbed Peach from the hole, almost from thin air. "So Peach" Bowser said. "Um, you wanna go back to my castle? And…bemywifeforalleternity?" (Be my wife for all eternity)

"Mama mia Bowser" Mario protested. "Why don't you give up?" Bowser smirked, and smoke blew from his nostrils.

"Hey, plumber, how about you leave your girl before I stomp you!" Bowser, in his new robotic body, was 20 feet tall, and now obviously weighed twice as much as the original Bowser; which meant he is now 3 to 4 thousand pounds. He stepped on Mario and Luigi, or at least tried. Mario responded by jumping and ground pounding the glass head. However, it didn't even leave a crack. "It's shatter proof" Bowser gloated. Suddenly, the suit shot out massive amounts of fire, fire that Mario and Luigi barely avoided. Now Bowser had put Peach down, hoping he wasn't going to hurt her.

Mario ran up to the leg and rapidly punched it. However, it had as much affect as a wooden arrow does on chain mail armor. Bowser simply leaned down, and mocked the brothers by pushing Mario away lightly. Luigi jumped up and kicked the head, but like before, there was no damage. "That's not gonna work anymore!" Bowser taunted, and then, out of nowhere, he lifted up a giant hammer. It had the same design as a hammer bro would have, just 50 times bigger. If it dropped, it could cause an Earthquake with a magnitude of 4 or 5. It was that big. With great difficulty, Bowser lifted up this hammer that without his robotic body, he would have no way to lift. He lifted it, and prepared to smash the brothers with it.

Mario felt like he was doomed. But he decided that the one trait Bowser didn't have was that he never liked to think things through. It's been that way since they were all babies. So, thinking quickly, Mario yelled out "Hey Bowser, isn't that the princess asking for your hand in marriage?" Bowser quickly dropped his hammer, and turned around with a giant smile on his face. "Peach, is it true? Have you-" Bowser quickly realized he had been deceived. But now it was too late. Mario and Luigi, now working together, grabbed on to this massive Bowser's tail, and hurled the helpless robotic dragon into the only volcano that the Mushroom Kingdom had. It was conveniently around there. So the Mario Bros. hurled Bowser into it. It then erupted, sending Bowser flying back into Dark Land, with his butt burned and his tail scathed, along with his nine kids now needing to rip off the hot metal off of Bowser's skin.

As per tradition, every time Mario saved Peach from Bowser, they had a small party. All the citizens were invited, so it wasn't so small. Peach and Mario had fun too all the time there. This time it was different.

When the party died down, Peach and Mario sat on the balcony, and they looked at the stars together. That night, several falling stars were in the sky, making the clear night especially beautiful, like it might not happen again. Mario looked at Peach, who was looking at the stars, almost hypnotized. Just looking at her made him blush. Peach was thinking about the time when she was in space, held captive by Bowser. How disappointing, she thought, that the circumstances weren't better, since space was so beautiful.

Luigi, meanwhile, was flirting with Daisy, since of course she was visiting. She and Peach were always close. "So Daisy" Luigi said nervously. "I hope you visit often. I-" Luigi was walking when he was talking, but he tripped. Luigi blushed heavily, so much so that he looked like a ripe tomato. Daisy giggled.

Mario, meanwhile, had put his arm around Peach, a gesture that Peach more than appreciated. "Oh Peachy" Mario said. Peach now looked directly into Mario's sky blue eyes. They were there as long as she could remember. She remembered them ever since the two were babies. Mario continued. "Oh Peach, I really love you" Peach blushed every time he said that. He had been saying that ever since Bowser had trapped Peach in her own castle.

"Mario" Peach started. "I love you too!" She kissed him on the cheek.

Meanwhile…

Bowser had camera's all over the castle, so he monitored Mario and Peach that very night, on the incredibly large TV in his castle. He watched while his minions plucked hot iron off him. His exposed skin was raw and burned. "Aww" one Koopa said. "Love is a beautiful thing isn't it?" Bowser puffed smoke out.

"Don't say a word" Bowser said. He yelped every time someone pulled larger pieces off. Soon, however, his torture was over when the iron was finally plucked off his whole body…except his butt.

"Now sire" one other Koopa said. "We're now, uh, going intrusive. It's gonna hurt." Bowser knew what he meant, so he braced for the worst. The Koopa lifted his tail, and pulled the still hot iron off. Bowser screamed.

"AHHHHHHHHHHH! CAN'T YOU GO FASTER?!" Bowser yelled as another unusually large and hot piece of iron was slowly being torn off.

"Um sir" the Koopa said. "You won't walk right for a week if we go that fast…but as you wish!" The Koopa braced, wiped his brow, and yanked the metal clean off!

Bowser screamed the whole night, and didn't walk right for a week.


End file.
